Life and Lyme
Muddling Through Life with Lyme Disease
The question is not how to get cured, but how to live.
Joseph Conrad
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Read more: solitude
My social life has changed radically in the past seven years, and it’s hard to distinguish how much is due to Lyme, and how much is due to COVID. Now I’m trying to figure out why I like the quieter life so damn much. “There is a difference between solitude and loneliness.” ― Maggie Smith This…
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holidays and opinions
Read more: holidays and opinionsI hate it when people don’t believe what I say. When I say something I don’t fuck around with double meanings or hidden codes. Sometimes I do tell people what they’d like to hear, especially about my health (sure,I feel good right now) or how they look or feel. This rant pertains to other things. If…
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crosswords
Read more: crosswordsI love crossword puzzles. My friend Kathy Fernandes got me hooked way back in 1978. Ever since then they have served as faithful touchstones in my daily life. The Daily Texan, the Houston Chronicle, Austin-American Statesman, Lubbock Avalanche-Journal, Winston-Salem Journal, Raleigh News and Observer, the Rocky Mountain News and Denver Post, for years I worked…
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decompression
Read more: decompressionI think I may be decompressing (or falling apart) after an incredibly busy and stressful summer. Now that I am healthy more than I am sick, I chose to cash in on my home and simplify my life. Sounds good, right? Well, I know moving. I have moved forty times in my life (this was…
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Michael
Read more: MichaelMy brother Michael died of a heart attack Sunday, August 29th in Lafayette, Louisiana while Ida banged through the state. He was sixty-six years old. His death was not a surprise, he had been in poor health for the last five years or so. The surprise for me was the depth of my mourning. We…
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identity
Read more: identityAll of this sifting through possessions and selling my home have gotten me thinking about my identity. Self-identity is a uniquely human trait, a sum of many things that defines who we are. I started off with an obscured identity, one attached to the circumstances of my birth and subsequent adoption. I had another name,…
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the future
Read more: the futureI’m at an age where I’m thinking hard about what I want out of the backend of my life. Moving has only heightened the scrutiny, and the process is not one that lends itself to definitive answers. For some people that isn’t the case. They will stay where they are, basking in post-retirement bliss in…
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moving
Read more: movingI can always tell when I’m fighting an infection now. Babesia, a malaria-like protozoan parasite co-infection that hasn’t been in the picture for over two years (maybe more, I can’t keep all this shit straight) has returned. It’s probably due to an overload of stress and activity. I’m selling my house and down-sizing. I made the…
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talking to myself
Read more: talking to myselfI’m in the “I need to give myself a good talking to” phase of recovering from this latest relapse. It’s the stage where I’m returning to normal and I always do that better physically than mentally. Unless you have experienced unpredictable lapses in your health, understanding the amount of mental strength it takes to get…
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Judgy
Read more: JudgyI try mightily not to be judgmental. In the effort to put myself in someone else’s shoes, I fail most miserably with myself. Some of the ridiculous judgements I make (only with myself): should you be doing this? Why aren’t you doing that? Do you really feel that bad? You’re just being [lazy, a drama…
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Even keel
Read more: Even keelI love the etymology of words and phrases. Yesterday, I wanted to say “on an even keel” in Spanish and struggled to explain what that meant. Two of the students are men in their twenties, and the instructor is a Puerto Rican woman in her twenties. Idioms are lost on younger people now (not all,…
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bowling pins
Read more: bowling pinsLately I’ve been looking at my life as a set of bowling pins. The bowler is life, and when all ten pins are gone, the show is over. I like the bowling pin analogy, because when one pin goes, it tends to knock down the other pins. If the ball strikes hard enough at the…
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pot
Read more: potSince I have been on the subject of herbs, I might as well talk about my favorite herb. I have a long and complicated relationship with marijuana. Sometimes she’s my bitch, and sometimes I am hers. Mostly it’s a solid, happy union that makes us both happy. Since legalization, I’ve been able to choose what…
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